The other night, after another barnstorming booze binge, I clumsily fumbled with my keys outside my tiny apartment, trying not to piss-off the neighbours, before tumbling through the door. I’d had a debauched and hedonistic night with my friends in a string of bars, including a karaoke place which had a selection of novelty costumes for its patrons to wear. A mental time was had by all, and I’d used my phone camera to capture my pals and myself in various states of drunken abandon, jiving and singing in schoolgirl uniforms and the like.

Someone begged me to share these hilarious pictures over the internet, so I decided to send them from my phone to my PC, so I could stick them on Facebook. With my drunken sausage fingers I selected “ME” from the list of contacts on my phone and sent the pictures to my computer email address. Hey presto! Isn’t technology wonderful?
With hindsight, I should have waited until I was sober before attempting this minor act of technological wizardry.
When I later checked my email, the photos hadn’t arrived. Upon examining my phone I realized where I’d gone wrong. Thanks to the alcohol-induced blurred vision, I hadn’t mailed the pics to “ME,” I’d mailed them to “MIE,” who is my landlady. Mie is a rather reserved middle-aged woman, who is constantly nit-picking about the correct separation and disposal of rubbish, and other such matters. Quite what she thought when, at four AM, she received a picture of me dressed in a much-too-small monkey costume and guzzling from a pitcher of beer, is anyone’s guess but I’m expecting the eviction notice any day now.
Oh well, it could have been worse. I could have been trying to send naked pictures of myself to “Adult Friend Finder.” That would have led to all sorts of confusion.
February 22, 2008 at 12:23 pm |
Oh god, where can I buy your book.
February 22, 2008 at 1:35 pm |
Thanks! Well, my friend, you can get the book now on Lulu.com (follow the links below!) and also Amazon.com in a few weeks.
(Only online for now, I’m afraid.)
February 22, 2008 at 3:13 pm |
Classic.
Please please please ask MIE for the photos, that monkey photo will be internet gold.
February 22, 2008 at 5:40 pm |
She’ll once for all that you are an interesting individual indeed!
LOL
Robert-Gilles
February 22, 2008 at 5:50 pm |
LOL… I hear it’s best for large Anglo Saxons to avoid terrorizing the locals. In all seriousness Roaf, have you seen this article in Discover? I thought you might be interested. I found it fascinating.
February 22, 2008 at 8:46 pm |
That has happened to me too…It was embarrasing to send my drunken pictures to people who thought I was serious.
February 23, 2008 at 12:16 am |
Next time be carefull to not add your blog address too.
February 23, 2008 at 1:11 am |
You have an ‘Adult Friend Finder’ account, too?
Phew! I was kind of worried I was the only one I knew who did.
My username is ‘Yokohamamama’. Look me up sometime;)
February 23, 2008 at 7:38 am |
Haha! Actually, I heard on Adult Friend finder in Japan, the women are tragically outnumbered ten to one by sleazy sailors.
February 23, 2008 at 7:43 am |
Thanks Woeful, that article is very interesting. I’ve been wondering about that stuff myself.
February 23, 2008 at 1:43 pm |
Oh my. That was laugh out loud funny. Oh, to be with Mie when she opened that email.
February 23, 2008 at 9:33 pm |
So where are the pictures? Oh, no! You didn’t erase them from your cellphone? So you will not only need to suffer your landlady’s evil-eye, but you’ll need to ask her for them back.
February 25, 2008 at 11:09 pm |
I think you must be a 1/2 brother of mine or something?
I’m about 1/2 Brit so you never know?
I have lost jobs, friends and students because I started typing and sending while drunk.
I even have a note to myself hanging behind my monitor begging myself not to send e-mails while I’m shitfaced.
I feel your pain
February 26, 2008 at 11:06 pm |
Yeah, drunk dialing can be deadly!
And those pictures are still safely stored on my phone but are definitely too humiliating to appear on this blog (and that’s saying something!)
February 27, 2008 at 6:23 pm |
I can see those pictures popping out at a job interview SO MUCH!
“We did some research and found this about you. Can you comment?”
ROFL
February 28, 2008 at 12:28 am |
I hope not!
February 29, 2008 at 5:57 pm |
Thats histerical to find the “Japanese Roots” article on here. I just did a report on the origins of the japanese in my japanese culture and civ class and I used that article! Anyway… I have officially stopped using my camera phone for the same reason. After I sent a picture of a boobs to my mom instead of my friend by the same name… Yeah. That was pretty much it for me.
February 29, 2008 at 8:59 pm |
Haha! That’s a funny mistake. Oh well, I suppose it’s nothing your mother hasn’t seen already.
March 7, 2008 at 5:50 pm |
Oh, good job there!
March 17, 2008 at 2:25 pm |
heehee that is hilarious. where is this bar you speak of? please tell me it’s in Tokyo (where i live) and that there is a 24 hour moving walkway connecting it to my front door
March 18, 2008 at 12:42 pm |
‘fraid not- it’s in Yamato, an otherwise boring city an hour from Tokyo. There are tons of crazy joint like that in Tokyo, though. Have you been to Smash Hits in Hiroo? It’s a karaoke place that look like a Roman Coliseum where you sing in front of everybody. Pretty fun!
October 20, 2008 at 10:18 am |
nice, fakey story you have there.
October 20, 2008 at 9:03 pm |
Nah, ‘fraid it’s true. If it was fake I would have said it was a picture of my dick!