Japanese Hooters

October 12, 2010

Nope, the title isn’t an opportunistic attempt to get lots of new boob-Googling readers my blog (although if that happens, I won’t complain.) In a couple of weeks, another of American’s fine cultural exports will arrive in Tokyo: Hooters. Japan’s first branch of the American restaurant chain, famous for its buxom waitresses in tiny orange shorts, will open in Akasaka on October 25th.

The Tokyo Hooters is the latest addition to the 455 branches of the chain found in 29 countries around the world. In a country which does not have much time for political correctness, it won’t be met with much protest. Indeed, it will fit right in with the maid cafes and hostess bars. The biggest problem will be finding suitably endowed women to work there. Although, by many accounts, bust sizes in Japan have been steading increasing for years, thanks largely to a more westernized diet, including fatty food such as hamburgers and milkshakes, (as provided by fine establishments like Hooters!)

I’ll go along and check it out and report back!

Hooters Tokyo
Address: Akasaka Tokyu Plaza 2F,
2-14-3 Nagata-cho,
Chiyoda-ku, Tokyo 100-0014.

Chin Chin Song

December 27, 2009

Here’s a treat for Japanese readers- a clip from” Colpo Grosso”, a sleazy Italian game show from the 80s, in which some naughty ladies sing the “Chin Chin” song. “Cin Cin”, of course, means “Cheers” in Italian, but “penis” in Japan.

I’m easily amused.

Playgirl Q

September 24, 2009

Wow! Evidently Japanese TV was much cooler in the 1970s.
Playgirl Q was like like Charlie’s Angels “with nudity and sexual content.” Nice! It was shown on TV Tokyo from 1974-1976, and actually pre-dated Charlies Angels by a few years.
Check out the funky theme tune.

Sequel to the long running Japanese TV detective drama of the 70s “Playgirl”, “Playgirl Q” featured Sawa Tamaki as a woman who sets up a private detective agency, recruiting a number of beautiful “thrill seekers”.

Fortunately, unlike the ladies’ magazine of the same name, “Playgirl” didn’t feature any naked blokes.

Raunchy Retro Beer Ads from Japan

July 13, 2009

To get you in the mood for the summer beach season, here are some 80s beer commercials featuring sand, curvaceous ladies in bikinis, lecherous middle-aged men, and lashings of beer.

The Pros and Cons of “Yaeba” Teeth

May 11, 2009

I’ve received an email from a girl asking me to post my opinions on “yaeba” (as did every other Japan blogger, evidently!) This is when a girl has an extra tooth growing out of her gum, otherwise known as the “snaggletooth,” and it’s considered very cute in Japan. The lady in question has written an English blog entry about it here.

I can take or leave the yaeba teeth. I think the bikini-clad girls in this yaeba slide-show I’ve been directed to are attractive in spite of rather than because of their chompers, but I certainly wouldn’t tell any of them to piss off to the dentist if they asked me on date.

Nice… er… teeth!

I’m not a body fascist or anything, and I think such quirks can add character to a face. Thomas Hardy wrote in “Tess of the D’urbervilles” something like “it was the touch of the imperfect upon the perfect that gave Tess her beauty,” regarding a mole on her face, and this thinking can be applied to Yaeba teeth. And, perhaps, when you discover an incredibly sexy girl has a snaggletooth, she instantly seems more attainable, unlike an airbrushed magazine model.

As a Brit, I’m less sensitive to dodgy dentistry than North Americans.
And, to be honest, I’m more concerned with other areas of the body! You don’t need to look at the mantlepiece when you’re stoking the fire. Ahem.
Mind you, one of those vampire fangs could do some serious damage in the trouser department. (Come on, I quoted Thomas Hardy, so I’ve earned the right to a dick joke!)

Final thought: Having a girlfriend with “yaeba” teeth would be useful when you can’t find the tin opener.

Boobs and Tits in Japan

February 2, 2009

I can understand why the owners of a surf shop for women might choose a name for their store which reflects the gender of their target market, but surely these shopkeepers in Sumida, Tokyo, could have come up with something better than “Boobs.”

There must be alot of disappointed male customers in brown raincoats trudging out of that shop.
The same, no doubt, can be said for the following establishment, a quaint and charming tearoom in the historical city of Kyoto. It’s called “Tits Cafe.” The poor proprietors must have been innocently thinking of the little birds rather than mammary glands when they decided upon that name. I’m sure Tits gets alot of business, though!

Japanese Bikini Trombonists

December 18, 2008

Just my luck- I wait all my life for a band of bikini-clad trombone players, and when I finally discover one I find out they broke up last month. Tsk!

“Futomomo Satisfaction” featured three female trombonists in bikinis,
performing covers of The Ramones, The Rolling Stones and Buggles, alongside original tunes. The three fetching girls, Jackie, Suzuyakko, and Lumiere, certainly put the “bone” in “trombone,” if you catch my drift.

The girls described themselves on their Myspace Page thus:

Futomomo Satisfaction is a Japanese bikini Trombone gal band.
This revolutional icon in Japanese indies, will inevitably fascinate you!

Indeed. This is the exact kind of inspired, uncynical silliness and lack of regard for convention that keeps me living in Japan. Here are some videos of their shows.

Here’s a link to the Futomomo Satisfaction website.